I feel odd... a had sex with a chick and she keept her socks on...
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
Someone should've told Pope jumper lady and terrorist pants guy that the Worst of 2009 lists already went out....
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
I knew the cheap date at Taco Bell would backfire because it makes even the most pre-cautious girls involuntary fart in public
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
Already puke and ralleyd and dressed like a bear.
He told the cop he was underage, handed the cop his ID, and the police report read "I then informed the suspect that he was not, in fact, underage"
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
if all that ever happens for the rest of forever is drinking wine and eating popcorn, ill be okay
My vagina loves me do-dah do-dah my vagina loves me do-dah do-dah
I picture you throwing your vagina around in the same fashion that they pass out candy at a parade.
DISHONOR ON YOU. DISHONOR ON YO FAMILY. DISHONOR ON YO COW
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
Is this a Beer, Vodka or Whiskey kind of problem solving night? It's imperative I stock accordingly.
Questions like that are why I love you.
Randomize
