You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
Keeping hand sanitizer and lube in the same drawer in the same size bottle = awful idea
im shaking like a drug addict and i almost just shat my pants when i sneezed...no more patron for me
I have a page in my 2010 scrapbook dedicated to pictures of his cock.
She told me I was lying in front of her toilet for an hour saying "lasers."
He filled our room with little plastic cups of beer so the only way I could get out was by drinking them all.
Your lower body and my face have had way too much contact lately.
Cause I came home. Im covered in green marker and jack daniels. Theres a taco and the words "we went to Mexico" on my wrist. Im a walking abomination.
I think I kinda scared him when I told him if he premature ejaculated I would punch him in the throat.
Wanna skype?
Can your lips gently and pleasantly suck on my balls via skype? If not, then no.
There has to be a way to make college graduation in Las Vegas different than any other Tuesday in Las Vegas. Strippers? Been there. Getting arrested for public indecency on the strip? Done that.
Come back. Shots need mouths.
Just realized Ive never seen my f buddy in the daylight. What if he looks different?
Your normalization of crazy is frightening.
I just bought condoms and a potted plant, making for a top ten super weird and awkward purchase.
Randomize
