Please don't use social media to get back at me.
I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
I am dripping wet and slathered in glitter and banana mush. I love gay guys.
sooo....i just remembered that someone fed me a pretzel out of their purse at the bar last night.
I said I was going to sleep an hour ago. Now I'm making plans to get high with the guy who mows your lawn.
Well tech shes born nov 12, but since her head was out on the 11th, she claims both days as her birthday
You shouted, "LOOK I'M HAWKEYE," and beaned mike with a dildo from across the room.
I don't even remember what he looks like. All I know is he's 6 foot 100. I like that.
I just remember banging him and then at some point I went and took a shower and went and laid in the closet
I don't think I've ever been sadder than the way I feel when I finish my meal while I'm high
ive started thanking my toys after masturbating. might be time to get some fuck boys
According to Joseph, last night I crawled into bed and told him to pretend I'm his French maid, and then started speaking with a German accent, and referring to his manbits as "ze greatest Weiner schnitzel I'd ever seen". Basically, last night was a roaring success.
So I fell alseep while I was motorboating that girl last night infront of the entire party.
Heels with jeans turned Casual Friday into Casual Sex With My Boss Friday
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
Randomize