I didnt attack him, I heard I threw a chair at him- big difference. And you know Im not a creep so whatever
I told him we couldn't have sex because I was ovulating and "I come from fertile people."
he just made me do "this little piggy" to his toes.
When hitting a Woodchuck bottle with a machete, glass will fly back and cut your face.
I hope you did not try this.
i get drunk faster, i spend less money on food, and i'm losing a shit ton of weight. depression and its pills are doing wonders for me
scratch that I can tell you where she is shes drunk on a beach somewhere being a penis slayer
I think I may be the only girl in the world that can say she has fallen asleep grasping a penis..... 3 different times...... 3 different penises
When and where the fuck did we get a beach ball??
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
Nope I went the fuck home like an adult
Look. When I let you cum on my tits don't fuck it all up by going "SKEET SKEET SKEET" it just pisses me off.
Spending the night with him made me realize that stupid people both irritate and fascinate me, so I'd say it equaled itself out.
"I licked someones beard, because I can."
I really love you. Like, more than tequila...& we both know that's my favorite.
I flushed a potato down the toilet so now we have to live in a hotel.
Randomize
