Help. Asians are flirting in front of me(773): They speak asian
I'm surrounded by too many unhungover people.
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
i'm trying to figure out what goes best with beef ramen. a 2007 merlot or a 2008 pinot noir? i'm leaning toward the pinot noir.
Pretty sure that drunken football on the back porch with 6 guys with a champagne bottle was a bad idea....
Also, I'd like to add that that I'm not quitting my job, my boss fed me shots at 11 am this morning.
you were sat in the corner crying until someone gave you a baguette, which you then tried to feed to the duck doorstop.
I regret nothing
Where would I incorporate "your boyfriend fucked the shit out of me last night" before or after Merry Christmas bitch?
It's 2:30 on a Friday afternoon. It's snowing and must be about 20 degrees outside. I'm sitting in this class with 300 people using up every ounce of energy and willpower not to puke all over the girl in front of me. This has got to stop.
Can we talk about how i am holding a tupperware container of my own puke in the back of my grandparents car while my sister drives
Who knows. Maybe the world would be a better place if more people sent their drug dealers thank you cards.
She said pants are for pussies while spooning peanut butter onto her frosted flakes with a serving spoon. She's not even high yet.
My most recent midlife crisis involved eating a doughnut in 30 seconds but taking 5 minutes to do half a shot of whiskey, then deciding I wasn't going to finish it.
At least you didn't get an invite in the mail to your fuck buddy's baby shower like I just did. My life is a sitcom
They have a shelf full of jello shots, what have i gotten myself into
Randomize
