real busy. everything is packed. thats why we ended up at the strip club
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Can we comment on the fact that at five thirty this morning, security woke me up in the hotel lobby, in my underwear, and some random guys winter coat?
I'm gonna fingerblast you when you get off work. Get ready.
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
My dick hurts from so many people grabbing it last night. We're not going back to that club
It's like god made him fantastic at oral to make up for what his mouth does the rest of the time.
My boobs looked so good under the black light I saw a girl physically cover her boyfriend's eyes.
As the cops are taking us away I see the strippers taking our DD backstage.
She called to say the cops were not fake cops. some one has to go get her in an hour
What should've been a 10 minute beer run turned into her having a 40 minute mental breakdown in my car while in the parking lot. She then asked if she could live at my house and be my girlfriend. Her finishing act was stealing my peanut m&m's.
Well, when a girl introduces herself as "stormy" and gets your number from her boyfriends phone, I'd say that your situation is to be expected.
Idk what's happening right now but im wearing a tutu and pissed as fuck.
Fuck you. All I remember from last night is telling random people that I'm in a "judgement free zone" then I threw up
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
Randomize
