I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
Not just anyone can homewreck on three continents simultaneously
you are my hero
On a positive note, new entry in my phone as 'HOT ASS, DOWN TO FUCK'. idk if its a boy or girl tho.
Update, its a couple
Coming home soaking wet at three am and trying to convince the front desk man that we came from the library might have worked if I wasn't also roaring at everything.
Ill bet we could have atleast fucked a girl who fucked a guy who has fucked tara reid. That's a famous circle right?
This girl just texted me asking me to drop her cheese. What the fuck for that mean?
She tried to beat the waitress over the head with a bread stick because one of her martini olives was missing a pimento. All while screaming "IT'S GAMEDAY BITCH"
Olive Garden will never be the same.
So high I started crying because I was proud of Snoop Dogg for becoming Snoop Lion
Nothing says besties like laying naked in bed hungover arguing over who is getting the pants
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Wish me luck. My vagina needs it.
May his noodley appendage touch you.
His dog was laying on the bed and he said we could have sex as long as we didn't disturb his dog. My life is pathetic
I have already put on my inside pants.
That awkward moment when your drug dealer pulls your boss out of the snow
You stuck your false lashes to your upper lip and then asked that ONE kid with facial hair if your "mustaches could touch" as an excuse to make out.
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