You don't need id to drink rum in an alley.
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
you said grace in the diner. 5am, drunk, grace. you thanked the man w the mushroom cut for the wonderful supply of screwdrivers
On a side note, I now know what a $150 cab ride looks like
Mark my words im gonna be the drunkest groomsman outta spite for him having his wedding on a gameday
4 am. She strained the mac and cheese onto her legs. She has no skin.
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
Let's just rave with boners that last for hours
When I take mushrooms I can feel your presence down there. I can feel where Africa is too.
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
No more house parties. We're almost fucking 30 years old and I slept until 6 pm.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Did he pick you up in a mini van?
Yes. Turns out my sugar daddy is about to be an actual daddy
Grandma said I got a good handjob. I think she meant manicure.
Randomize
