it was like playing where's waldo with your underwear
I probably shouldn't have followed up that rainbow sherbet with beef jerky. This is a whole new level of fat, even for me.
don't think this is any sort of attachment thing but if I'm going to throw up regularly at your house, I'm going to keep a tooth brush there
I wouldnt consider it a good Wednesday if there wasn't any projectile vomit involved
I blacked out after the shots of canned lobster bisque.
I think this breakup is Gods way of telling me I deserve a bigger dick
Ok fine. Wild. Free. Like a stallion set free in a beautiful meadow filled with flowers and sexy lady horses
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
That's the last time you suggest we can get our tab wiped by out-drinking the bartender.
It was my card, so what do you care that you lost?
Is your card paying for my plan b?
We couldve played the bring a random boy to lunch game but i made him go home
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
The only times girls talk to me at clubs is when they're asking if I'm okay when I'm puking outside. Or if it's a tranny
Yes. He better. Or I will shave a penis into his beard while he sleeps.
So my furniture is upside-down, two lamps are glued to the ceiling, and there is a kitten sleeping on Kyle's face. Please tell me what happened last night....
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
