I think I just saw the silver monkey from legends of the hidden temple sitting out in someone's trash
GO. BACK. NOW.
Also, just saw a homeless man answer a phone call on a blackberry...
Sorry about all the noise last night. We were trying to break bottles by kicking soccer balls at them. If it's any consolation, there's shattered glass and blood all over my kitchen.
You can't see him, he's in front of the dildo, but Amelia Earhart is blocking your view.
i just remember sitting on this bed, naked, STILL WITH A CONDOM ON, and suddenly these random girls were in the room shouting at me
We carried on a casual conversation about plants while I gave him a hand job.
The cop was more concerned with the syringes on the dash board than looking for the source of the smoke. Thank god for diabetes!
He was so drunk he was throwing the bowling balls into other lanes on purpose. He still beat my high score thought.
Found a fruit roll up in my pocket this morning. This means my daughter has a peach blunt wrap in her lunchbox.
Who was the person who brought the rooster when they won @ beer pong
At a point I was just cumming dust last night
She was blowing me like a porn star and all I could think was "you just told me your grandfather is dying in hospice right now"
She's astronaut crazy. She will wear Depends and drive 12 hrs non-stop if you swipe right.
Challenge accepted
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
she peed her pants, took them off, the put them back on. but she only put her legs in one hole.
Randomize
