I think I speak chipmunk. Odd.
Are you high?
No. That's why it's odd
Oh fyi, I gave your card to a homeless guy last night and told him you were the world's hottest blonde girl who only likes black men...Sorry
he was writing an apology letter to his liver in shakespearean english... That much fun...
I need to stop taking drags of other peoples cigarettes, it's such a tease. Like playing just the tip, you just can't
we literally hit three floors of our apartment building searching for condoms. also got macaroni.
We decided that the paper cups disintegrating was god's way of telling us we had had enough
Walk of Shame today included voting.
Nothing like wearing your heels and smelling like henney in the afternoon
Covered in confetti and bad decisions
I'm like the kid who wants his birthday and christmas equally. Every time I get one I want the other. Only I don't want holidays I want brothers
2nd year in a row being a arrested before school starts...tradition at its finest
I was wearing my get used bookstore shirt when we fucked. Ironic yet appropriate.
I am walking funny today. And it's sad because it's from the bad encounter with the sidewalk rather than a good encounter with a stripper
me + whiskey = a bad person
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
Woke up with a lip tattoo that says "fake news" in case you're wondering about my wellbeing
Randomize
