it turns out jennifers body is not good to beat off to. yeah its megan fox but when she pukes up blood = goodbye boner
How fortunate humanity is that it need not rely on the female orgasm for procreation
At some point I'd like to figure out how the weird kid from sociology ended up on my couch naked hugging what appears to be some sort of clothing....seriously it's creeping me out
That was an excessively violent trivia night
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Dude, you need to man up. You passed out before a PRESEASON game. It's a long season.
Why do i feel like Captain Hook just gave me a pap smear?
I ate shit on a rock, and when I got up this car full of people asked me if I was okay, and I just sprinted away screaming "I am a banana!"
i swear to god if you did anything to my honey bunches ill remove all the oats and shove them up your dickhole then play pinata with my foot to knock them all back out
I asked him for something to clean up with after sex and he handed me a sham wow. A SHAM WOW
I can see the future and your future is full of penis
she made me cum so hard I dislocated my jaw. I'm keeping her
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
I would offer you moral support, but I have questionable morals..
I hate closet cases. I've been wooing this chick the entire quarantine. We finally meet up tonight, we're two drinks in, I've got my hand half way up her skirt and her husband calls. She promised to bring home dinner.
Randomize
