She is in my trunk
I thought she would fill the void you created. Turns out she thought I just wanted to fill hers.
Also how the fuck did i get like 30 brown napkins
Don't worry. I just took 2 benadryls and beat off. I'm practically sleep texting
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
All I can think about is getting a lawsuit and chocolate
whatever a "slut portfolio" is, mine is apparently almost complete
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
She had another shot and asked if I wanted to taste her tongue ring. Then I helped her pee.
He left my apartment when I broke up with him just as my booty call was walking in. It was a little awkward...
You do realize he's just an extension of his penis, right?
You date? I thought you just hooked up with your TAs
Ugh. It's days like these that make me wish my bad habits would kill me faster
Your amazing boobs made me fall in love with boobs. I never cared about boobs you should be proud
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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