I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
I need to stop coming to work sober
Maybe he just has a boisterous penis
Don't blame the cocaine for your eating disorder.
something had to give and with her weight the coffee table never stood a chance
we found you under the sink... we opened up the doors and you told us to go away because you were playing indian in the cupboard
i seriously wanted to pee on her right then.
mate, my mother watched me threw up out of my nose wearing only a g-string.
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
I woke up in his bed wearing nothing but a penn state hat. We are....
Is it possible to sluttify a hobbit costume? Cause if so, this will be my biggest accomplishment.
Good luck. While you're suffocating on a dick, I'll be eating pizza rolls. Being a good girl.
Sometimes I get confused on who I really actually know and who's lives I just know everything about via internet. Its a fine line
You call it sex. I call it penis conditioning.
Seriously considering taking a nap at lunchtime in my car. That. Hung. Over.
Randomize
