Baton twirling is one of his activities on facebook.
Also he is "an Ohio stae gran champion twirler". You cannot tell me he's straight
I hate when laundry day is determined by the number of cum stains on my bed
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
I wonder if he just picks random boners to send or just the realy impressive ones
Also, I just saw a woman change into her stripper outfit in the bathroom at Target.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
There are some sad choices of men in the ER. That one was missing teeth. Not the place to find a husband.
She really has to stop the coke at some point. Won't she run out of money eventually?
Won't she run out of nose eventually?
You slapped the bar and yelled "daddys thirsty!" at the lady behind the bar
To be fair I was thirsty
When she told you not to yell you looked directly at me and screamed "Man, she sucks!"
He got too drunk... he threw up ON the closed toilet.
It's a Jersey thing
Figured out how to triple bathroom speed at #lollapalooza.. Girl squats, guy 1 goes between her, guy 2 uses urinal. Your welcome.
Are you missing a tooth after last night? Because I found one in my coat pocket...along with what smells like dried jäger and a package of deer jerky.
Uh not that I recall.
Oh wait nvm. It's mine. Yeup, definitely my tooth.
I just peed on myself the semester has officially began.
She deleted me on Facebook. I think it's safe to say that she knows I fucked him now.
We met behind our asshole boss's back with the intent to oust him from the company. If this revolution is a success, bring nachoes.
Randomize
