Fuck appropriateness.
there should be a rule against ugly people hooking up.
yeah...but then what would the ugly people do? hook up with pretty people? yeahhh..don't see that happening in the near future. plus i'm not okay with that.
A homeless guy asked you to feel your boobs, you accepted in exchange for his broom to go with your witch costume..... that's when I cut you off
We learned about herpes today in bio. I might as well have given the lecture
She calls her new ritual "bed, bath, and beyond crunk". Hence why I found her passed out in my bath tub this morning.
she refuses to pay for the plan b and so do i. it's the most dangerous game of chicken i've ever been involved in. but i have my pride.
im not picky. i just want someone whod go down on me while im writing my psych midterm paper. thats not a lot to ask.
he's drinking beer at home in his underwear tonight and if you want to come over the dresscode is underwear only. And you have to bring beer.
Dude, I think someone on your skype account may have seen me beat off. I used your computer and didnt realize you were still signed in. Please tell me no one was on...
I can't wait to hear about your drunken cab ride to planned parenthood at 2pm
Gin and redbull in a wine glass. They think I'm keeping my wits with a really yellow Chardonnay. Gonna get ugly after a couple.
I just stood next to my childhood self. Fuck, I'm really stoned...
He said he was a banker. Then he told me he made 15 an hour. I said he was a shitty banker then fucked his friend.
It took me an hour to walk from my drive way to my front door... what the fuck was in that weed?
Saw throw up in the parking lot at work, glad I'm not the only one. But now the search begins.
Mary's wearing shades at her desk, brilliant!
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