i think im in love. he told me he doesnt care if i shave down there.
Just woke up and stopped at the WaWa in Virginia. Had major morning wood and didn't try to hide it when walking around. So many awkward stares.
i think a pirate just stole the rest of our fucking beer. what an appropriate costume.
Packing up everything in the dorm. Silly bands to unused condom ratio is ridiculous.
Beware of calls from Dad. I just had a longer than I would care to admit convo about the ididarod. Apparently it starts tomorrow.
She stumbled in with some guy, woke me up, introduced him and said "This is my sister. She's a freshman. She probably hates you."
My neighbor asked me to tell you to stop changing in front of their house. Do I even want to know?
Do you think you can get drunk by standing in a tank of vodka if it is seeping into your skin?
In his defense he just bought a bong like a week ago so he's still in that honeymoon phase.
Found a grenade pin. Still no Dave.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I went to watch porn and there's already 3 Santa videos. Happy November 1st.
I always felt my time would come in the form of a tidal wave of whisky
Some nights you do cocaine till 5:00 in the morning, and the next night you teach yourself how to crochet. It’s called balance.
Randomize
