Going to bed naked. Too bad I am all alone. Need to make some changes. Either sleep with clothes or with you
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
He's on drugs...like drugs for horses.
I walked into cold stone and the guy started preparing a supersized birthday cake remix for "Mrs. Munchies"
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
Then we managed to set a grill and all 24lbs of meat on it on fire. I didn't help because I was filled with alcohol and extra flammable.
Sitting in a bubble bath with my bong, how's your morning?
Can I interview you during sex or would that be weird?
It was weird, because he kept shaking his head like he was motorboating me...but on my vagina.
I just offered a cat a "drinky drinky" I'd say my night has started
We were on a plane, I couldn't just grab his dick
you bit my nipple really hard and then looked at me and said 'i feel responsible for the state of your nipples'
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I smell like a mix of alcohol, sweat, and sex and its only 10 AM
Randomize
