Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
I've come to the conclusion that if I was an old man, I would perve around in short gym shorts for kicks.
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
I think it got a little awkward for her when my dad walked in on us and did nothing except leave half of his pizza on the table for us.
I thought he put a fake swan in my yard, but no, he put a real life swan in my yard
Hey start looking around for a low rider Subaru. Well get a loan. It will be capital for our first music video.
finding an unopened condom on the ground can really change your outlook on the night
I traded my pants for a Santa hat last night and it was so worth it.
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
She rode me wearing nothing but a Santa hat. Merriest fucking Christmas!
Is Facebook telling the truth about your nipples?!
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
quit whining, rub some dirt on it, and lets get out there
its my penis
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
You walked right into the door. Even the door guy and security guys were laughing.
Randomize
