gavin joseph was born around 1 oclock 9lbs 12oz... over 21 inches long
Thats what she said
My social work teacher just told our class about her bicurios adventures in college
is she hot?
She is now
I was just counting ceiling tiles when he ate me out, it was that bad.
I usually would've stopped there but I kinda remember opening the bottle of vodka, and we ALL know that's when things go downhill.
You tried to sled down the middle of the street. In. Your. Coat. Of course you are bruised.
Grad practice is like a live scrapbook of my drunken sexual encounters
I dislocated my rib eating pizza. I think I am broken.
thought the power was flickering out but it turns out im just blinking
sometimes after I smoke and the high has gone away...the high will come back like three hours later for a brief yet gripping ride.
that's usually when I end up in someone's house, having sex with someone else, while that someone's roommate makes us mozzarella sticks.
Hi this is the guy from the cell phone store. Your Dad just upgraded your phone as a surprise. I didn't tell him about your topless pics on your phone. I transfered them to new phone. Nice rack!
Oh my god there's only so much masturbating one can do before one wants to fucking cry
Bullets don't scare me. I wish I was a coyote
Just bumped into my ex. Blowing a dude in the ladies' room at Disney World. I guess it really was her not me.
He obv doesn't know that telling a woman to chill will get him murdered
i am not an asshole. i paid for her to take a cab home.
dude, we were in ann arbor. she's from cincinnati. ten bucks didn't even get her back on I-94. i maintain my position. you are indeed an asshole.
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