do you think it i'm gay because i was in a 3 way lastnight?
well not if you dont touch the other dude and concentrate on the chic
what chic?
I called Tyra Banks a whore to her face. A sure sign I should go home. Instead I went to the gay bar.
you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
Well. Nothing came of that. And to think I manscaped and dusted with gold bond.
Can we ask the Hungry Howie's guy to pick up some blunt wraps on the way over?
I just don't understand how a line to ride a camel on a college campus could be too long for you to wait in.
Either I got the clap, or I masturbated with soap while I was sleeping.
YOU SUCK AT REPLYING IM IRRESPOSNIBLY DRUNK WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU DOING WITH YOU LIFE. celebrate the magicness with me.
I asked for a steak knife but the waitress could see in my eyes it was a bad idea
weekly advice from mom, "Drink vodka, it las hess calories"
I just spent 20 mins in the shower washing n rewashing my body to get rid of stripper. I even loofa'd my face.
You wanna see what happens when frozen corn meets an unhappy Andrew's face?
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
THERE ARE SO MANY HOT DADS AT WHOLE FOODS
His mom wants to come see the dorm.
Hide the whip.
Randomize
