i dont have any money that hasnt already been designated for cigarettes and birth control
Just tried to tap morse code on the wall seperating our beds to tell you I was awake and ready to smoke
Whatever. I'll let someone else deal with his flacid penis.
I just want you to know IcyHot in the ear is weird. Don't ask.
I'm sweating while I eat mac and cheese. That fat.
Yeah he's still asleep. I washed the blender out. He tried to make a ham-shake. Lets wait until after break to have that talk. I kind of want to see where this goes.
Whoever said that remembering a girls name is a basic rule for getting laid has never met me.
I told him I felt we were at the point where if I saw him talking to another girl, I'd probably choke him out. So I guess you could say things are getting serious.
Hmmm... I thought we agreed as a group we make our last stand in Philly...
I don't wanna go out like that. Covered in melted cheese smelling like a sewer rat...
She's hot and all. It's just I don't want to become Eskimo brothers with my sister
Sooooooo, can scratch getting a pelvic exam by a man dressed as Woody from Toy Story off my list.
You need to write an essay about this experience.
He was even wearing the hat.
Don't take a pillow from my bed. You don't know which ones of them my vagina has been on
Sometimes the most spiritual fucking thing to do is punch somebody in the face.
My mom is dancing slutty on the bar I need more drinks to be ok with this
May have told my history professor I wanted him to stuff me like a turkey. Too slutty?
Nah, people appreciate the creativity of seasonal sluttiness. Let me know if it works!!!
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