There is a reason Crest White Strips don't list masturbation as one of the myriad of activities to do while whitening your teeth. A very good reason.
Turns out, Windex will cut right through semen stains on a computer case.
Ah that type of Dick. I think my phones trying to make me less of a whore by capitalizing Dick. That way it looks like I'm talking about a dude not penis
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
So..I walked into his bathroom and found a bong and a blender in the shower.....normal?
I wouldn't necessarily say I'm in her pants...I'd say I'm more on the on ramp to the freeway to the long way to her pants. There really isn't a short cut.
I have no idea what's going on.... I just want to wear my horse sweatshirt and drink vodka.
Just woke up and my doorbell is on my nightstand... the fuck?
I would never do this in real life. It's only college.
I respect your roll as DD and there're am required to respect your vehicle
In that case, if you come anywhere near my house you can expect to be chased down various streets by a half naked me wielding a baseball bat. No, I am not giving you my address.
Why so serious bruh
You reeked of guilt and shame and we offered you pancakes
She was nothing like her profile said, we had nothing in common, and her picture mustve been like 30 pounds ago. But yeah we hooked up
Well, my mom found the ball gag and whip. Looks like I'm never going home again.
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
