glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
We're pre-gaming then going to chuck e cheese's.
If you're joking I'm going to be sad
Did you ever feel like going into a planned parenthood and performing an abortion in front of them?
Umm..who the fuck is this?
Oh shit
so she finally agreed to being friends with benefits. not only did I take her virginity, when I woke up, she brought me French toast made with homemade bread in bed.
I worship thee.
Dude. Hurry up. They just blessed the tequila.
A French guy bit my cheek. Is that sexy there? Also had to threaten to stab the bus driver. I'm not sure I like Europe.
nothing says "you're fucked" like watching a movie with the family and a handle of vodka comes crashing down from your hiding spot in the ceiling tiles.
I like to balance the number of cups of coffee to bong rips in the morning before work.
Bring me the dick of your room mate Alex and I will reward you in in skittles.
She told me that for every Ravens touchdown, I'd get to come once.
Marry her. Marry her now. I'll help you steal the ring.
I just want nice things and good sex
HOLY FUCK I almost floated out of the city. Thank god my dog kept me down.
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
After we'd both come, we started writing a book about dragons. Woke up this morning to a full English breakfast. Can't thank you enough for introducing us
I wish i didn't black out tuesday so i could have cherished our moment together
Throwing up together is NOT a cherishable moment...
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