"Worlds Wildest Videos" should be called "Crazy White People"
I've been deciding between brands of bagels for 20 minutes. This why I doint smoke weed.
Ever since he's come out, my facebook stalking experience has gotten uncomfortable
She had to put it in. I told her I was too drunk and didnt trust myself to not put it in her ass.
That's what you get for fucking someone nicknamed "wiggle worm"
are you aware you chucked your pizza at a girl's face after the bar last night?
Drunk you is everything I aspire to be in life.
Bering your kids um. Abiout tol. Throw up
Come on. I'll make you hot pockets. Literally and sexually.
Don't. You get on the 18 year old. I'll get on the 38 year old. Together we will bridge 2 decades of cock.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
Would I waste your time for mediocre porn?
He was late, on account of he accidentally went to the Al-Anon meeting across the hall, and it took him 30 minutes to realize he was in the wrong room.
I love that there are toys on the counter. Coffee, tea, wine bottles, gag ball, and handcuffs.
My kitchen gets me.
woke up with a tree in my apartment. also the everclear bottle is suspiciously low
suspiciously? i think one of those explains the other
Randomize
