I'd give my left nut to see you
don't do that. I like the set
I'm gonna have sex with a woman...help
I wonder what my nutrition professor is going to think when I have to put 21 keystone lights, a bottle of merlot wine, and 5 rum and cokes and 4 shots of tequila on my dietary analysis
Just got judged by the front desk clerk, 2 maids and a security guard at the Sheraton. I've decided to use this as a character building experience.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
I don't see what kind of idea someone could get from an envelope covered in jesus stickers and a note from a person and their dog. I'd say crazy person alert before flirting.
You straddled the banister and fell down the stairs, then proceeded to crawl back up them, I think you need to lay down
Please tell me that is you having sex in my car in my driveway and not a complete stranger.
Don't be embarrassed its me, I've licked your taint.
I mean your new thing is losing body parts and feeling colors so its not like we are hurting for entertainment
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
There is nothing worse than the batteries of your vibrator dying on valentines day
I came so hard I went blind for a few seconds.
Really I don't care what we're doing or watching. Your penis spends way too much time outside of my body.
You took the receipt and ate it. You then took it out and gave it to the waitress with slobber and holes all over it.
Randomize
