covered in glitter, my cheek hurts, and theres a handprint on my face. Would i do it again. Absolutly
U just looked at me and said "wake me up when I'm done eating"
Telling me its the beginning of school is like telling me the crown royal fairy has come back from vacation.
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
can you come back were all locked out and alyssia's still inside passed out on the floor but more importantly i left a beer in there that's not finished
He just asked for the blowjob I promised him 3 years ago that he'd get the next time Michigan beat Ohio State. Goddamnit.
We could be hammered at a childrens film. You failed me
He was my shower sex Sherpa last night. And we both made it safely up the mountain.
I'm semi drunk. I just bought you penis moisturizer. Not kidding. Keep an eye out for the package. Merry Christmas.
"Douchebag of the Year" award goes to the guy who didn't reply to the picture of my tits.
I completely forgot about the posting of partying pics shortly after adding my gma my dad was like grandma says your all over fb but she doesn't know how to use it. Of course I'm all over her fb. She's got 6 friends I am her newsfeed
Apparently you can unlock an iPad by doing a line on the lock screen I'm about to bust that myth
Honestly my life is shambles over a married man who looked like a fuckin NERD ON HIS WEDDING DAY
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Idk, I know when I drink vodka my bi side comes out and I just want to make out with a girl
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