she lunged for my junk like it was the cure for swine flu
his genitalia just looks like a thumbs up. a really really small thumbs up.
I feel like a need a fire hose to wash off what I did last night
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
Probably not well advised, but you're welcome to stop by if your not ready to end your night. You know, for Thanksgiving's sake.
I want to be the sort of person he can respect in the morning once the drugs wear off.
i think the last part kind of negates the first part there
It takes a special friend to go vibrator shopping with
Yes. It does.
That's why you need to have them together. Katie started crying on the couch and she just gave her a tube of crackers and picked up a beer at the same time. She's like a goddess of making things chill
I still don't know his name but his ass is spectacular. Like he should never wear pants.
Im part way to drunk.
God is tempting me with everything tonight. Brownies and dick, mostly.
Can you send me the picture you took of me smoking a joint with the cat make-up on?
It was after I slept with him he tells me he's a juggalo
Well it was nice knowing him
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
