would you object to me following you around all the time with a video camera and selling it to TV? Your life could make me millions.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
Her brother was practicing the clarinet....it was like having sex in a starbucks
hot twin vs twin who's good in bed. why do my life choices same way unfair
we put a pacifier in your mouth because you kept drunkenly singing country music.
Ask if he wants his tooth back. It's in the freezer. In the box of hotpockets.
yes, i was eatting raw cookie dough and fingering myself at the same time.... is there a problem?
And fyi howling is not an acceptable form of communication.
Do you ever wonder what the men who we shamelessly objectify would think if they saw our texts in regard to them?
i'm pretty sure i can feel a baby kicking just looking at him. if he didnt impregnate you, you officially have an iron-clad uterus.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
im too broke to be in a relationship this close to the holidays
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
So...I'm pretty sure I have officially determined that reverse cowgirl is the only position possible to have sex in my smart four two
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