some old guy just shit himself in my section. everyones leaving
you kept wiggling your finger at everybody at the party telling us this is how he fingered me. you seemed pretty upset about it.
i woke up convinced that my room was backwards i tried to go into the closet to get outta my room
Ive created a fbook group called "threesome" and invited two girls. Im not going to say a word and just see what happens.
i dont care if i had to wear a dress to fuck her, she was super hot and i stand by my decision
New game: Step 1) Turn on ESPN. Step 2) Drink every time someone says "LeBron."
They just yellow carded someone for spilling a drink because it was a party foul. Love germans.
Now I can say "look me up on Pornhub."
The reality is I'm 24 and I have terminal breast cancer. Fuck yeah I'm going have sex with every hot guy I can. What, am I gonna worry about getting an STD or pregnant at this point? If I'm gonna die, I want to have any many big dicks as I can while I'm still able.
Sex obviously provides more sustenance than oatmeal.
The only reason I have clothes in my overnight bag is to cover up my sex toys.
The twitch Bob Ross stream is the happiest little hangover cure ever.
i also remember watching someone vomit off a balcony which was kind of grim
Dammit. the window insulation sheets are too small for my windows. Yet again I am disappointed by size
I either have a problem or a really good solution... I just ordered my homecoming dress off of a website that sells forplay outfits.
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