i guess it's bad bediquette to quote the kool aid man
?
he said oh yeah and i responded with OHH YEAHHHHH!
just took a pee in my own yard...decided i had to poo..only got a dingle berry....wiped it away with my finger..help me...my mom AND dad are home.
My mom just called and reminded me not to throw up in any cabs tonight. Happy St. Patty's Day.
I wish there was a non slutty way to ask the guys across the hall if i can copy their men's bathroom key so I have one for my one night stands
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
i woke up completely naked except for a bottle of beer saran wrapped in between my boobs
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
Dude. That is just waaaay to much random to process after that tequila battle.
My liver and my bank account can't afford another all nighter. Help.
You know when you get a stripper pays your bail. You got good wood.
You tried crawling through the apartment window instead of going through the wide open door next to it
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
nothing like waking up to a voice mail saying your std test came back negative
I just did a bump with my mom so I’d sober up for Black Friday shopping
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Randomize