I might come over and watch a movie but I can't spend the night. my parents would wonder where i was
you're 26.
It's an Italian thing I guess, grew up on that shit.
I'm Irish, we don't eat cow guts unless they're blended into a fine whiskey
Quick, to the slutcave!
i just had sex with a fat kid who giggles when he cums. tequila really lowers my standards.
Goodbye hot boy in my geo class...goodbye my lover, goodbye my friend. you have been the one, you have been the reason I came to claassss
When I told her that her boyfriend was making out with another chick, all she said was "which one"
Freshmen girls are like potato chips you can't have just one.
I'm so bored right now i'm literally Googleing all the possible ways to get high with household items as my mom is sitting in front of me..
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
I just stabbed open a can of Spaghetti Os with a spork. Who says I cant take care of myself?
Watching videos from last night and u go "I should be the president, I can get whatever I want w my tits"
New rule: I am no longer allowed to speak
Starting St Patrick's Weekend, non stop flights on Pacific Whorelines to the scenic HotMessXpress. Get the cougars ready, it's gonna get weird.
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
Yep. The ghost of my sex life is in your house.
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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