drinking steel reserve before noon and watching the price is right... 211... bet i pass out before then.
9 am. shotgunning while conditioning my hair. i love college football season.
There's a girl n class drinking wine out of a taco bell cup. I can smell it.. it's totally reisling. JEALOUS.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
As soon as he told me I had a 'pretty laugh' I knew I'd be putting out more than I had originally planned.
My mom seriously just told me my insurance company pays for rehab. In an email. I expect a real, not just us joking, intervention coming on. I'm not accepting a "lunch date" with that bitch.
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
We realized he wasn't with us anymore, so we turn around and he's 20 feet back, peeing on a squirrel.
Ok, it is technically a gay bar but it's a total dive w/ strong drinks. The important thing is you can start drinking at 11:00 am without judgement
oh oh oh, and apparently you can bring in your own snacks. Some old dude just gave me cashews and cheetos.
I feel like i could break down a fucking wall with this boner
Soooo, coming over soon?
Nobody is here, I still yelled for someone to make me some toast. That my dear is commitment to doing nothing.
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
Stop calling me, Mom. I'm in his closet. You're gonna blow my cover and I'm about to catch this lying SOB.
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
