so while trying to be a healthier drunk i discovered that putting airborne in natty is not an advisable decision
Just saw a white stretch Hummer limo outside of CiCi's pizza. Way to live up to the stereotypes, Alabama.
glow-in-the-dark stars on his ceiling from '98 totally make blowing him more romantic.
Maybe you should go over there and lead him on and reach down his pants like he's about to get some and yank his balls.
That's the best idea I've heard all day.
if the best thing you can say about him is "he probably wont kill me" you may want to rethink hanging out with him
He's blaming gravity for his problems right now, so put that in perspective
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
I wore a firefighters hat and drank beer all night. They had to drive me home after breaking the beer pong table, they told me I was welcome back tonight though...
Even when you're down just know that I will always be the one to pour alcohol into your asshole when you're on probation
So I put a beer on your bed and jumped on th3 other side of the bed like in the commercials. You my good sir, owe me a budweiser that your bed drank.
It's like he drunk calls 6 times for me to come over, but can't say hello at lunch.
3 2 1 whiskey
she kind of stumbled up and said "Bitches be needin' stiches." i thought i could convince her to break a bottle over someones head but she fell onto her face and passed out before i could say anything
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
This is the fourth guy that I've broken in to gay sex. How the hell do they find me?
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