I'm on the bus and the homeless person in the seat to my left is jacking off to a cartoon picture he found. He's now cleaning up with mitten I dropped.
He told me to pretend to be a shark, and he would slay me with his harpoon cock.
I know I am usually the slut but tonight it's her. She is being a slut, yes slut, T as in Tomorrow, U as in Uterus, L as in Llama and S as in Sangria. That spells slut, but backwards and that's what she is being.
the boat had a sign not to jump off the roof of it, which gave us the idea to jump off the roof of it
I already have one guy that I have regrettable sex with. I don't need another.
Lets just fuck. We'll decide if it was makeup or breakup sex after.
There's a point around the one and a half minute mark where the keg stand goes from impressive to pathetic
You need to be more adventurous.
I am! Just not in a "I wanna get diseases" way
It was like an ecstasy filled massage for my vagina.
That's the best compliment I have ever received.
Spent 20mins wondering why my roommate wouldn't answer after we were pounding on the door.....Def went to the wrong building.
I cried over the lack of milkshakes I've consumed in the last month
I'm pretty sure I just orgasmned my way out of paying for that weed
There's always a silver lining when massive voluptuous tits are involved
I told her to to let go of her rationtal thoughts and just enjoy the fact that i was going down on her till she passed out from sheer orgasmic pleasure.
I think he's an actor
That's not a good enough reason to wear guy-liner
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