do you ever lay in the bath and watch the blood hit the water?
EWW. Don't discuss your period with me. You can go shave your back now.
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
just heard 2 nerds making fun of a girl for mispronouncing stochiometry. they followed it up by discussing the mathematical equation for getting laid. my day just became 100x better.
Fuck morning classes. Fuck early work. Fuck anything in the morning that doesn't involve sleeping, sex or bacon.
He won't talk to me. He'll only communicate using scissors
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
Dude, they're still mid-coitus. Pretty sure running in to high five my roommate mid-thrust is a mood-breaker.
I feel like you just railed me after that sext
Liz is crying about burritos again.
Bring the pizza ill bring the boundaries we can cross
But you can't tell me I give the best blow jobs and then not break up with your girlfriend who has fucking TMJ! Come on!
Nah I've been there. The worst you'll see is some hobo peeing in a sewer at 3 am on a Saturday
you bet i'm gonna rock his four-foot-two world.
There's nothing wrong with using cocaine to keep my heart rate up in my fitness class.
We're both fucking guys named Frank. Our friendship was meant to be.
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