How's tricks little girl?
Trix are for kids, old man.
he confessed his love for me, threw up on my pillow and then fell asleep on said pillow. i met him last night.
better than last weekend. things are really looking up for you.
it was just fiscally responsible to stop going to strip clubs where the strippers recognized me
It's really awkward/depressing when you are wearing heels larger than his dick
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I hope he says my name when they're having anniversary sex this weekend.
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
The 78 year old woman who works next to me divorced her ex husband, remarried her first husband, and retired all in one day. I'd say it makes your breakup on Valentine's day pretty insignificant.
It was everywhere. My dick was a sprinkler of lost future children.
No, Ethan, handcuffs and friendship bracelets are not "basically" the same thing.
So I love answering sex questions in intimate relationships class on a clicker when im sitting next to my cousin..
wait you like me?? for my personality??
I know I was surprised too
I am drunk shake weighting right now.
First aid class means get dry humped by moderately attractive college students during heimlich maneuver training.
the coup got in the way of sex but inauguration day came thru we did it joe
Randomize
