Alcohol only hurts me because he loves me.
she farted while i was going down on her. not doing that again
Tipsy and thinking of you. Talk tomorrow. My alliteration is awesome.
so i turned around to do some reverse cowgirl when he said that this was such a better visual for him. Bad compliment or serious insult. i cant tell
She was so wet my fingers were literally pruney when I got done with her
I just got a whiff of tequila through the air conditioner.
just had a flashback of you pouring champagne into my mouth from someones balcony..
There were so few words spoken that I'm not sure if it was make-up or break-up sex.
It's a long way off yet but I've started planning my eviction party. Be prepared, it includes jungle juice.
I stopped in the middle of puking to wish you a happy birthday, so by default it means a lot.
My nephew just told me I smell like apathy and regret. Thats the hangover I'm dealing with
Tonight just try not to threaten to pee on the hot guys buying us drinks....please..
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
well i don't know if 30 seconds is exactly a good time but at least he bought me breakfast
Im four hours late for work AND i pissed my bed
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