theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
dude uncooked spaghetti noodles dipped in thousand island dressing is better than it sounds
She just left after she spent the past 2.5 hours fuckin the shit out of me. I'll put that in the logbook as a cross country
Only your wife would write 'for deposit only' on the back of that $1500 check knowing full and well our capabilities of spending it on strippers and booze
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
Can't decide which I like more. Telling a girl she's pregnant or telling her she has herpes. It's the little things that make medicine tolerable.
I slipped on a piece of pizza last night and when the bouncer helped me up I told him the garbage can pushed me.
Going through Bojangles drive thru chanting "KFC" hammered at 8:00 was the highlight.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Just whatever you do, don't neglect the balls.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
We peed on a building I think...like a building in downtown...not out of view of anyone.
You know you're more responsible when you turn down your bed and make a clear path to it before you go out..
Legal advice please. Can you sue someone for jerking off to photos of you?
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