also, made friends with this 75 year old millionaire Tony who likes to mosh. Don't ask.
just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
I had a wet dream about my mom last night. words can't even begin to discribe how scarred I am. what. the. fuck.
Can we fast forward to the part where we get gyros
I heard from multiple reliable sources that she doesn't have a gag reflex. Of course I'm going to try to go home with her.
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
If you could come over after class and poke me with a stick to see if im still alive id really appreciate it
I've never felt so epic in my entire life as I do right now, my bare testicles staring down the ocean itself
Not sure. All I know is that she has a tight dark green skirt and I will not rest until I have used my teeth to rip it off of her
I woke up in an empty bathtub with the wrong brother
Oh that's what I forgot last night.. To make out with her.
So, when I got arrested, they fingerprinted me. I'm getting my nails done right now and I'm pretty sure he's filing off my prints. Worth the $30.
oh god I've lost the ability to distinguish between 'star trek' and 'the future'
Yeah. I don't know. I'm just gonna show up at her place on valentines day with a jock strap, box of chocolates, and rose clenched between my ass cheeks with "be mine" written across my glorious man titties.
So, my first week in Saskatchewan ended with me drinking moonshine and getting eaten out in a tractor. I already love it here!
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