that's the type of pussy you go to the bathroom and wack off before you fuck her, just to last longer inside of her!
i left him drunk and in the fetal postion in the shower.
was the water running?
yeah but he said he knows how to swim
This guy in church just had a prayer request to help him get through his hangover. He is my new hero.
the worst part is we had a camera rolling
Did his mom notice it when she saw u guys?
Yes.
I have to watch that.
you flashed the cab driver so we didn't have to pay the fare and then you decided you were on a roll so you flashed the guy at the maccas drive through... safe to say your boob job was the best idea ever!!
The working title of my paper? "Tailgating: A Big Clusterfuck of Kids Who Dont Actually Give a Shit about Football"
Ever have those mornings where you just can't wait to puke in the shower?
But Alex is drunk in Philly and I told him to come see me so that's "first-love,-drunk,-high,-and-it's-a-snow-day-hook-up-with-an-ex" points. 69
We can see it once so I can see the whole movie, then I'll go see it with him so I know when the boring parts are and I can have sex with him during those parts
Meh. People are people bro. All of us are hairless psychotic apes. Happy 420.
Please. That's just a patriotism boner. I watched Michael phelps win another medal and had to change my underwear.
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
just in the smoking shack with my sister cheering on a caterpillar make its cocoon
my only goal for the semester is never go to my wednesday class sober
Herpes is not a lady problem you can solve with shower beers and kissing boys
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