all thats left of you is your magnum wrapper on my dresser
so then you were screaming "GIVE ME KELVINS!" and heating things up in the microwave and no one knew what you wanted
it was average length and chubby
so kinda like him?
now i'm wondering if all guys are shaped like their penis...
im so glad i don't have to work tomorrow. I'm spendin all night on the new call of duty.
Wow. That's the gayest thing you ever said.
Look man i'm staying in playing videogames and growing a beard. Its not like i'm trying to get a girlfriend.
Last night drunk me texted a sure to be hungover me my class schedule and locations for today. I'm like a mom preparing her child for the first day of school
i knew she was high when she broke up the cookies into her glass of milk and ate it like cereal
Go for the frenulum. Its like eating a popsicle. They go nuts with that shit.
he literally had a slideshow of all the girls hes had sex with pictures set to american woman
hold on, were in the kitchen painting a yellow brick road to my vagina on my leg with black light paint.
And for some reason I was covered in ants... So your probably covered in ants as well
she got the mcdonald's logo tattooed on her ass. sober. yesterday at noon.
btw my frat has a search out for you. the "girl who threw up in the middle of the party" but it was on some fat girls. so thank you.
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
the shoes thing blows my mind idk how the fuck i did that and im also missing 4 of my birth control pills like did i drunkenly decide to overload my body with estrogen
He literally just made me hold his dick while he peed cause he wanted to know if I could aim as good as him
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