i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
he picked an earring up off the bar floor and tried to give it to girls as a present.
I'm in the "I'd rather have Carbs than Dick phase" part of my Life right now. YOU tell me how much Skinny Sex I'm having.
My phone now knows what I type and it prompts me with frequently used words. And anytime I use "and" and hit the space key two of the words are "unicorn" and "sausage"
I just threw up on the floor. And we're gonna fuck on the beer pong table, so keep everyone upstairs.
stuck in a tree...bring a ladder. also my arm might be broken. no questions are allowed.
You climbed on top of the bar, shotgunned a 25oz fosters and screamed, Steve Irwin was a God amongst men.
this night just went from meh to biblical thanks to drunk naked yahtzee
My balls are resting on a block of frozen cheese in a sealed bag
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
Is it a bad sign starting the new year off naked, wet, and alone?
Asking for a friend of course
the people in front of me have a grocery cart in their car... i missed college...
He took off all my clothes, fingered me, than said "would you be more comfortable if I was naked too?"
Randomize
