me and ur bf were arguing about whether coke was vegan. i really hope it's vegan
He's the biggest piece of shit to ever exist. He's not even wearing shoes.
They left shortly after you claimed the dirty rug as your mattress and began alternating between singing "Dayman" and "Nightman"
My plan for valentine's day: take a shot for every guy I've slept with. To keep me from going to the hospital I'm only doing half a shot for small dicks
I'm so hungover I took Dramamine to help prevent the motion sickness of walking.
Apparently I had an idea for a cooking show and then proceeded to throw cookies at people.
She came to college a virgin and left on court order. We ruined her.
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
he peed on his own floor last night after we left the bar. pretty much sums up how i feel about the evening
Guess who won a bet and gets to name it Optimus prime if it's a boy
Nevermind. Totally worth it.
They invited me day drinking but brought their kids. 3 two year olds and 1 11 month old. I was asked to change a diaper, I laughed and took another drink of this margarita. I LIKE CHANEL AND TEQUILA NOT CHILDREN. Can we make new friends?
Someone downtown drunkenly stole the antenna off of her car... while she was driving.
Yep. My memoirs will be called "A Slore Worth Mentioning"
what do we think the timeline is for when your liver will begin to revolt against your drinking habits?
She tied me to her bed using her honor chords. Thank god for graduation!
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