Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
I was so hungover that I had to stop in the middle of the game and throw up. The fans cheered.
I don't think I have ever puked up that much free breakfast in my life...thank god for Nickle Beers.
and then we had to stop you from trying to pour shots through your nose with the neti pot.
I don't think we had sex because when I woke up he was still wearing the chicken suit.
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
My mom just covered me while I peed in the street. I love her. i also love parents weekend.
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Not much. Some creepy guy on Grindr thinks he knows who I am and where I live. So I sent him to that place with jockstraps and bacon. Hope he has fun.
Just told my boss I wasn't coming in to work because of a serious case of blue balls. Totally made having them worth it.
That's good to know, because I will be doing terrible things to you. Terrible things, John, wicked, evil, maniacal things shall happen to you and I will have the audacity to call it sex
STILL COMPLETELY OKAY WITH THIS
Is it bad that I'm not at all bothered by the fact that to some people I'm simply known as the girl that takes her shirt off?
THEY'RE HAVING SEX ON A HORSE AND THE HORSE DOESN'T EVEN CARE.
I teamed up with my vagina. I compromised his morals and then she corrupted him for good. It’s been a very successful and slutty partnership
Randomize
