after drinking 6 jumbo margaritas he then proceeded to tell the entire restaurant that he was going to "bust a load in me" when we got home....how do you think the rest of my night went?
I think the waitress doesn't beleive I have friends coming. I've had 4 drinks and a large salad just waiting for you guys.
You layed on my kitchen floor with a pile of m&ms at your crotch, said "your lightbulb don't match, is that one new?"
We have a drunk bartender with her nips a quarter inch from bein out buying us shots. GET HERE.
You just said the magic words
I made him hve sex with me in the elevator so that I could put my finger down in never have I ever.
Even the bar was yelling boobs, so of course the shirt came off
I asked you if you needed a ride and you kept saying "no, my name is katelyn"
What made this night legendary was getting pulled over for looking suspicious while wearing an iron man mask
Vaguely remember? You pushed George and two other fellas out the way to hug me, screamed gandalf before chugging your beer and smashing the bottle on the floor. I lolled.
On the train at 650am after a night of clubbing and running away from a new zealander who was buying us beers but also licking windows
I think my AA sponsor just booty called me.
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
So I woke up this morning to find my laptop open, with a google search for "where to buy marble", and a hungover naked northern girl in my bed who told me that I claimed to be a sculptor last night and that I promised to sculpt a bust of her hands...
I just baptized you in budweriser and you were cool with it
And I mentioned the burning debate about your circumcision in my Christmas card to your mom.
Randomize
