so, on facebook you can become a fan of butt sex, and also premarital sex, but not premarital butt sex, which is what I was aiming for.
had another sex dream about alec baldwin...
my mom found me this morning spread out like jesus sleeping on the living room floor. i had a piece of bread over my eyes to block the light out
he kept a regular condom in his wallet just so he could comment on how it wouldnt fit before whipping out the magnums. i give him points for the build up
How do the freshmen here NOT understand the tricks we are playing on them by now? Doesn't bode well for grad numbers. Idiots.
I threw away my jacket instead of washing it, the jungle juice stained me more of shame than red food coloring... i have never been that white girl wasted before...
When I was leaving this morning he gave me some candy off his floor to prove he was a nice guy... He definitely knows the way to my heart. Best one night stand ever
I think i'm going to homewreck at this Disney on Ice show.
Care to explain the single rose and the package of "Cowboy Moustaches" I found on the porch?
You handed me an unpeeled grapefruit off the frat basement floor and then took a bite out of it.
I think our maternal nature is best focused on grown ass men and cats.
When he was leaving this morning he said I'll text you later on and I replied with if you don't that's cool too.
my underwear is inside out , I have a giant hickie. I'm wearing last nights makeup. this is going to be the best day at work ever
For the love of god, if any of you are up, bring me pants.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
Randomize