"You squeeze, we tiip biiiiiig" JB
oh well we may not be friends on facebook but at least i got laid
Just think, the more you drink, the more options you'll have of people you want to hook up with.
even in the morning, she still thinks my british accent is real.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
Pretending to be straight requires way more energy than I'm willing to use in this heat.
Still can't believe they give people like us a drivers license and college degree.
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
I'm sure it was awkward. I've never had a professor expose parts of them to me before.
If I were there, I'd be putting a martini in you, via funnel if need be, and you would be doing this thing.
I don't even want to think about the kind of person who would shit in the street before 10pm on a Sunday.
Another day, another engagement, another cat
No like you've drunkenly persistently tried to take your shirt off in the middle of a park filled with children. You had already thrown your bra at my crotch.
a large sweaty girl i dont know is sleeping in my bed. A scotish man and a small child looking dude are on the couches im on the floor sleeping and im ok with it
Well just give me the address, I'll bring the bourbon. If they let that into mental institutions
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