btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
We've finally come to the understanding that as long as our conversation stays stricaly sexual, we get along.
Just had the weirdest flashback. Did we buy melon, take it into the restaurant and try to make them give it to us as dessert?
Anxiously awaiting my period drinking Hershey's syrup from the bottle. Don't judge me
I'll be there in spirit. Right there in your vagina.
I'll feed you vitamin c from my mouth this weekend. Like a baby bird.
Promise??
How is there no taco emoji?! That's some bullshit.
I'm in public and Taylor Swift is playing. It is taking all my effort to not screech like a goat.
I just got fingered in the Win-Co parking lot for pills. How's your meltdown going?
Just walked by the barren window naked in a family neighborhood. Who needs dignity.
I just put on underwear fresh outta the dryer and it's like tiny Angels are giving them warm supportive hugs all over
I really just gave up on masterbating because I'm too tired. I really am getting old.
he passed out in the backyard and we used christmas lights as extension cords for the clippers to shave his head.
Once again I let my vagina make the decisions...that and vodka :(
Randomize
