I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
I woke up face first on my living room floor arms outstretched toward the christmas tree
i was concerned by what you said you would do for a snickers. It wasn't even a Klondike bar.
dude i have an english essay and a bio lab due tomorow
so basically your not goin out tonight?
who said that?
having my hair in braids makes puking so easy. i am being an indian every halloween
There was a punch bowl full of straight vodka. Glass bowl, ladle, vodka, and no punch at all. It was something of a rough night
Babe, I need to be clear. I DO NOT WANT TO HAVE ANAL. Never. No anal. No "talking about it"
Numbies before the dentist, such a good idea.
I want him to rummage through my vagina. with unwashed hands.
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
I like that you're Jewish, because you can rail me on Christmas Eve and it won't be weird.
Well apparently I decided it was easier I piss in the trash can at waffle house than In the toilet. Would've been ok if the trash can was in the bathroom.
Stephen I'm in a lecture and the lecturer just said 'you can CHOOSE to put something in your mouth and swallow it" i'm the only one here who burst out laughing, this is awkward. Thought you'd appreciate it.
They'll never let you practice medicine.
GOOD MORNING. Have you seen the Avenger vibrators?
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Randomize
